Well, today was half good. Boyfriend came to see me and we went to Super Wal Mart to return a game he got there that doesn't work. But he had to go when we got back and will come see me tomorrow. We were talking about how I need to get a job, like, this second. I have exactly two months to get a job and then get a car. You know what Boyfriend said today? He told me he would help me get a car if I pay the insurance. Hmm...good deal. But the idea of my boyfriend paying for my car makes me feel pretty bad. He already buys me stuff all the time. He is also going to be getting a new truck pretty soon and was all "You can have this one." Again, I would feel pretty bad if I just took his old truck and didn't pay him at least something for it. He is too good to me.

So I need a job thisfast, and that is virtually impossible here. I have no transportation so it has to be close. Good thing I live in town. But if you don't have extreme connections here, nobody wants to hire you. I asked several places today if they were hiring and they all said no. Several places. Small towns are bullshit. Nobody wants to give me a fucking chance here. None of them know me, they just see me all the time and automatically think they know something about me because I make my hair different colors and where my little spiky bracelets and pants with more than one zipper. It's not like I would wear anything like that to work. I'm not fucking stupid. I try to be nice to people. I put on a regular pair of blue jeans, a t-shirt, my hair is just a plain auburn color right now, and I get applications. I put in the applications in my same "normal" clothes. I do the smiling, the "thank you"'s, I do all that. And I still don't get shit. All I get is news later about someone that works there talking shit about me. A few months ago I turned in an application at Wendy's. The next day Stephen says "Hey, you know when you turned in that application? As soon as you left, our manager ripped it up and threw it in the garbage. She made some smart ass remark about your hair." This is almost understandable if my hair had been blue or purple or something, but it wasn't. It was red. Not blood red, not fire engine red, just a natural auburn/brown. And it was faded so it was more brown than red. And I don't even know this woman. I have only seen her there before. She has never talked to me in her life and up until then I had nothing against her and have always been nice to her. But you know what? I hope that bitch burns in hell. Things like that make me so frustrated I could rip my hair out. Or better yet, hers.

Here's another one. A month or so ago I turned an application in at Pizza Hut. I figured "Hey, I'm friends with a few people that work here right? And it wouldn't be a bad job since you get tips and all." Well guess what. A few days later I find out that someone that works there, someone I know and actually considered myself friends with, talked some shit about me and now they won't hire me. You know what? Fuck him. I hope a large truck hits him and he burns in hell. And you know what else? People make fun of this guy all the time and he's completely oblivious to it. But out of all the people that make fun of him, I've never said anything bad about him. I have always been nice to him and he was always really nice to me. So if what I was told is really true (and in this town you can't really trust anyone's word of mouth bullshit) then, well, fuck. Oh, but guess who was told she is getting a job there, when she has mad fun of this guy? Becca :D. Go figure. (Sorry Becca, nothing personal). Story of my life people. Story of my fucking life. If these people got to know me instead of listening to other people's mouth ( who don't know me themselves) they would know I am a way better person than they apparently think. I am very against drugs, I don't drink, I try to be a good Christian person (despite this very vengeful entry), and I have higher morals than most of the people I know. That's why I can not wait to get out of here. To go to college where nobody knows me or has even seen me before. I can not wait.